Every now and again, I need a reminder of how far I’ve come. Previously I’ve mentioned that I measure my progress by weight and photographs and sometimes I need to look back at where I was years ago, when I thought I was happy because I refused to admit that I wasn’t. I remember the photograph on the left being taken and thinking “oh that’s ok, I don’t hate that photograph” sure Amy, happy.
This year I’ve been struggling to shift the pounds on the scale but I’ve been working hard at the gym (just not so hard in the kitchen) and it’s kept my body changing. I have a new goal dress that wouldn’t go over my hips at Christmas and now it goes on, too tight to wear but I’m pretty close, I’m also a good 5 pounds heavier than I was when I bought it. Although I’m still right in the middle of my fitness/health journey I am proud of from start to finish, I regret nothing because if I wasn’t pushing a size 20/22 then I wouldn’t have been able to change my attitude so significantly. This does mean that I refuse to be told that I should not be proud of my body, proud of my stretch marks from growing fast and eating too much or that I shouldn’t be proud of where I am in my journey because I’m not a size 10.
What should I wear for my body shape?
ANYTHING YOU BLOODY WANT. Seriously, there are so many “rules” and they really do my head in. As a tall, pear shaped girl with a long body and short legs there’s a whole list of things that I should never wear thanks to Fashion Lady (number 1 in google for “what not to wear pear shaped”:
- Skinny jeans – they’ll accentuate the pear shaped
- Avoid belts – they make your hips look bigger
- No bodycon – too revealing and will show too much of your curves
- Avoid pastels – dark colours looks more slimming
- No high waisted – they draw attention to large hips
- Avoid mini skirts and shorts – “short garments will make your bottom look flabby”
- Pointed shoes – will help your legs look longer
Having struggled with my body image for decades now, I’ve read all of these tips over and over – let’s make something clear, they’ve never made me any happier. Bodycon dresses are one of my favourite types of clothing, they are easy to wear and look great on a pear shaped body. Everything I wear is high waisted too, my large hips make my small waist look even smaller and I am into that.
On my hunt for the perfect bikini top I came across these denim shorts covered in embroidered palm trees, I hunted for my size (which is NOT a uk 20 Primark short your god damn sizing out) and before I knew it I was quoting all of those bullshit rules in my head. What the fuck has happened here? So with my naturally defiant, some might say stinking attitude, I trotted off to the changing rooms with my new shorts that break the rules and will make my “bottom look flabby”. Turns out, these shorts are fucking fabulous and I love them.
My arse will always be fat. I refuse to apologise for being proud of where I’m at. I refuse to be sorry for being so fucking happy in my new shorts.
Sorry for all of the swearing mum.